The Vineyard Monster

Beside the vines north of Osoyoos, a telephone pole stands where the rows meet open ground. Years ago a few strands of Virginia creeper found the wood and the wires. They climbed. They spread. They became a figure with two pale eyes and arms that reach along the lines. Locals call him the Vineyard Monster. He accepts the name. He has earned the watch.

He is proud of the fruit. He stands above the rows not as a scarecrow but as their keeper. In spring the new leaves open on his body the same day they open on the vines below. In summer he feels the weight of the clusters through the soil he shares with them. In fall his own leaves turn red while the grapes turn heavy and sweet. Birds nest inside him. Leafhoppers find him first. He has guarded this ground longer than most remember, and he does not share it lightly.

One late afternoon a vagrant wandered up from the ditch. He had a bottle of wine from these same hills. He spat into the dirt, laughed at the neat rows, and called the grapes “good enough for a free drink.” Then he tipped the bottle. Red wine hit the gravel and the dust. A splash landed near the first row. He kicked at a vine, muttered that the whole place was wasted on people who wouldn’t share, and poured again.

The monster’s arms tightened on the wires. His eyes stayed fixed on the waste. The vagrant looked up. For a moment the vines on the pole seemed to lean toward him, the figure gathering itself as if it meant to step free of the wood. The bottle fell. The man turned. He did not get far.

No one saw him leave the edge of the vineyard. The bottle lay empty on the gravel. Footprints ended where the vines met the ditch. After that the ground stayed quiet. Travelers still wave when they pass. The monster settles back against the pole, proud and watchful. The grapes still hang. The leaves still breathe. He keeps the watch so the next one who would waste the fruit remembers that the vines are not empty rows for the taking. They belong to the figure made of creeper who stands among them, and he does not let them go.

Made of a full grain Veg Tan leather, hand dyed, hand painted and laser engraved.  

Dimensions- 21.6 Tall x 24.1 Long x 12.7 Wide CM
Strap- 127 x 2.87 CM
Artist- Rheyastudio